Thursday, June 27, 2013

the worst dream / give the man an oscar

so i know some people don't "care" about dreams and don't want to hear about the dreams of others. first off, i always want to tell everyone my dreams. second, i want to hear everyone's dreams. third, if i am featured in your dream, you better fucking tell me or else. that being said here is a very symbolic and important dream i had recently:

i was at a party at my friend's parent's house. it was casual but then leonardo dicaprio showed up wearing a black suit and black tie. he and i went upstairs to the bathroom where we proceeded to make out. he then sat down on the closed toilet and asked me to give him head. so i did that for a while, then i moved his ballsack aside, revealing a vagina. suddenly leonardo dicaprio started touching my face and saying, "lick my clit," over and over. i said, "okay," and did what he said.

i hope no one ever reads this.

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